


But That's Where You're Wrong

by NewYearsEveBaby02



Series: Tumblr Request Snowbaz Fics [1]
Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Angst, Based on a Tumblr Request, But we all knew that, I kinda re-wrote it, M/M, Poor bb, ahhhhh I'm so excited, baz is a sad little vampire, but i wrote it at 4 am soooooo, simon is an idiot, simon is v gay, this is after the humdrum arrived at hampshire, this is good, this is the first story of my tumblr requests!, we knew that too, yay, yesssss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-12-21 17:39:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11949315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NewYearsEveBaby02/pseuds/NewYearsEveBaby02
Summary: This starts around the time the Humdrum visits Hampshire and then I re-wrote everything.Based on the request: 'Baz telling Simon he kept him sane'





	But That's Where You're Wrong

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ChessPargeter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChessPargeter/gifts), [And Ken Who Encouraged Me With Memes](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=And+Ken+Who+Encouraged+Me+With+Memes).



> Hi hi hiiiii it's so late/early and I'm just so happy to have filled my first Tumblr request!! Yay!! I hope you like it my lovelies!!

**Simon**

“Baz!” I scream, whipping around to see where Baz collapses against the ground. I grab my hair and it’s hard to breathe. I can hear the Humdrum giggling happily, and I just barely catch the image of him vanishing into the forest. _What am I supposed to do?_

The World of Mages expects me to be the Chosen One and defeat the Humdrum. But they grey-eyed vampire lying on the ground needs me to be Simon Snow and keep him from dying. I can't lose him. Not again.

I sprint over to Baz and fall to my knees at his side, frantically looking him over for any injuries. I don’t see anything out of the ordinary so I press my hand against his chest, watching it rise and fall weakly. I almost cry in relief. He’s still alive, thank magick. But I need to make sure he stays that way.

“Baz,” I say, desperately shaking his skinny body. “Baz, wake up, cmon.”

He doesn't move.

*

Not even five minutes ago I had him. Wonderfully tangled up in my arms and fast asleep, I had him. His head was against my chest and everything smelled like trees. I tightened my arms around his waist and he hummed in approval. It was so good because no one had ever been mine before. But then he was gone. And l had never felt colder.

My magick was being sucked right out of me and I _knew_ it was the Humdrum. My stomach dropped to the floor and I was forcing air into my lungs. I staggered out into the freezing morning and tried to make everything go away. Baz was a monster with a mouth full of daggers being provoked by a ratty eleven year old with a red ball. It was a nightmare come to life.

The Humdrum filled Baz with emptiness. And it was too much. So he fell, and took me with him.

*

“Baz, _please._ Wake up and be okay. I . . . I need you to be okay. Please. Baz . . . just-just wake up!”

His dark midnight hair is splayed across the stark white snow and makes his skin even paler. He looks like an angel. A dark, vengeful one you wouldn't want to get too close to, but an angel all the same. I would say he looks handsome but that's not right. He has razor edges and toxic lips and a cruel tongue. Handsome doesn’t cut it. Baz is lying in front of me, dying, and he still looks like he could kill me.

Baz is fucking unearthly. He’s too bloody for Heaven, but too pretty for Hell. And I can’t do this.

“Baz!” I cry, taking him in my arms all at once and holding him close. I shudder and hot tears start to spill down my face, soaking his hair.

“I’m sorry,” I gasp, shaking as sobs rack my body. “I’m so so sorry, Baz. I did this and it’s my fault and I can’t _do_ this anymore!”

I push my curls away from my face and choke out, “I can’t keep hurting you. This is all me and I have to stop. I need to _leave.”_

His eyes stay closed.

“I’ll . . . I’ll get your parents. They can save you. They can _save_ you. And you . . . you just-” I lower him gently onto the snow and briefly kiss his unmoving lips.

“ _You don’t need me, Baz.”_

His eyes fly open and he lunges. His fingers wrap around my wrist and he snarls fiercely.

“ _But that’s where you’re wrong, Simon Snow._ ”

I try to pull away, but his grip is like a steel band. A fresh wave of tears overtakes me, and it takes everything I fucking _have_ not to throw myself into his arms.

“Baz, let me go, _please_ ,” I beg, my face twisting in pain.

His eyes look like flaming pools of mercury and I think he’s going to kill me. I’m sure of it.

“ _No,”_ he seethes, digging his nails into my skin.

“I’m killing you!” I scream, thrashing wildly and trying _so_ hard to run away. “Why can’t you see that?”

His face is as hard as stone but I see cracks everywhere.

“No, you aren’t, Simon. I promise that you-”

I interrupt him. “Stop it, Baz! I am, I am, I am! You’re dying and I-”

He scream-laughs.”I’m already dead! You can’t kill me, Snow!”

“It doesn’t matter,” I say, shaking my head sadly. “You. Don’t. Need. Me.” I use all of the strength I have to try and wrench away my arm. The sudden burst of movement must surprise him, because his fingers loosen. I pull away and start to run. And run.

My breath explodes into the air and my feet are crushing the snow beneath me. I choke on my sobs and I’m crying so hard that I can’t see. But I keep going and I don’t look back. Because if I did, I would never be able to leave him again.

And that’s when I notice it. Light, easy breathing. Long legs sprinting across icy ground. Black locks twisting around a slender face.

 _He’s chasing after me._ I almost laugh, and that’s bad, so I move faster.

But suddenly a blur rips by, knocking me over and pushing me into the snow. I close my eyes and groan in defeat; I know it’s him. I lie there for as long as I can manage. (Which isn’t long.) I look up he’s standing over me with slightly parted lips and and clenched fists. Typical.

I open my mouth to tell him something that will break the both of us, but he cuts me off.

“No, let me talk. Just listen,” he says quietly.

I don't say anything.

“I do need you. I need you so much that it scares me. And there’s so much you don’t know. You-” he pauses, as if searching for the right words. “You kept me sane.”

I’m so confused.

“Do you- do you remember when I was locked in that coffin for six weeks?”

I nod wordlessly. _How could I forget?_

He licks his lips and continues. “I- I wasn’t exactly keeping it together, in there. Far from it, actually. Eventually I got to a point where I, well, where I was losing it. I kept feeling myself slip away, but I . . . had something to hold onto.” He looks up at me and it’s so _raw_ that I don’t quite believe that Baz Pitch is really in front of me.

“What?” I ask, breathless. (I truthfully don’t know.)

He hesitates. And blushes. He fucking _blushes._

“You,” he says, and then it all comes out in a rush. “I held onto you because you have blue eyes and bronze curls and you’re so alive. Nothing could hurt you. That, and I’m hopelessly in love with you. I am _hopelessly_ in love with you, Simon Snow.”

His eyes are fixated on mine, and he’s open for the whole world to see.

“So don’t you _dare_ say I don’t need you.”

I forget how to do everything. But when is that new.

I think I forget to see too, because Baz is kneeling in front of me now, and I can’t remember how he got there. He rests a finger on my chin and raises it up so I have to look at him.

“Hey idiot,” he whispers shyly, “say something.”

“IthinkI’minlovewithyoutoo,” I blurt out, and he smiles so big that his face breaks right open.

“That sounds like trouble,” he says, his smile transforming into a smug grin.

 _That’s because you are made_ _of trouble._

“I know,” I smile back, “but trouble always seems to find me.”

“That it does,” he responds, pretending not to notice my arm snaking around his waist.

I pull him closer and our foreheads bump together. Clouds of white mingle in the cold air between us, and all I can think is _Baz._

“I forgive you, you stubborn bastard, but don’t expect me to apologize for chasing after you.”

I laugh. “Never. But you won’t have to worry about chasing after me again. Because I kind of like you.”

“Good,” he says, moving forward so our noses touch.

“Good,” I say back, grinning.

He rolls his eyes. “Just kiss me already, Simon.”

I do.

**Author's Note:**

> My Tumblr is @carryonmylovelies so find me and send a request if you like!


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